Wii = The Sound Fun Makes

Wheeeeee!

The two Is give it a Japanese spin — and trademark.

Hmmm…. I should trademark “The Sound Fun Makes”.

This post because someone came to this blog based on that search query.*

We aim to please (although most aiming done around here is to kill…)

*Update: The actual search query was “what does wii mean”. I tap-tapped this entry on the goddammed 770, which makes me want to do things fast. So I tend to not be clear.

Ah, The Future Is Bleak. As Usual!

Ghawar Is Dead!

Screaming “Ghawar is dead” and lighting a lantern in the daylight, confirms one ‘certifiable’ for most Americans. Peak oil is here now! Saying even this engenders looks of complete incomprehension among the masses! Peak oil means the death of the American dream embodied in those cold, dead, marvels of plasticity on Anna Nicole’s chest. Hell, it means the end of plastic surgery! It means the end of economic growth and everything that entails. Our collective fake-life can’t go on much longer after its real-life sources of nourishment dry up and become the ashes of history. It won’t be long now until we realize that our world has come unplugged from the ancient sunlight that provides its artificial neon glow.

–linkswipe via reddit

How Come When I Say This I’m A Crank And Bastard?

The Real Reason the US is in Decline

It’s all true too!

But Hippos Are So Cute!

Another crushing disappointment in my life!

Are hippos the most dangerous animal?

I’ve heard more than a few times at zoos and on nature programs that the hippopotamus is responsible for more deaths in the wild than lions, tigers or crocodiles. But no one ever mentions what they do to kill so many people. Lions and tigers attacking people make sense, being meat eaters, but what do hippos do? Could you expose the hidden side of this otherwise goofy looking animal?

We hear “fat and bald,” we think “affable, jolly and placid.” But notwithstanding Hyacinth, the hippo in Fantasia, Hippopotamus amphibius is as mean as a viper and a filthy pig besides.

Just kidding! I already knew this. I did too!

Update: Iin my zeal, I left out the link!

I Want To Marry Wednesday Addams. (As If She’d Have Me!)

When she’s all grown up. Let’s not get sick or illegal here, dammit!

Addams Family Values (1993) —

Morticia Addams: Children, why do you hate the baby?

Puggsley Addams: We just want to play with him.

Wednesday Addams: Especially his head.

See prior post for context.

You Fools. This Is No Act.

So there it is, the early 1980s. And this eejit I had to do business with one day comes out with this on the phone to me.

Eejit Suit: Mike, we want to change your image. We want to have a picture of you holding a baby.

Me: Can I hold it by its neck?

I swear to God, my reply was automatic and without hesitation.

And I meant it!

Eat Mercury And Die, Lighting Nazis!!!

More against confiscating my God-given traditional lightbulbs:

CFL Bulbs Have One Hitch: Toxic Mercury

The Environmental Protection Agency and some large business, including Wal-Mart, are aggressively promoting the sale of compact fluorescent light bulbs as a way to save energy and fight global warming. They want Americans to buy many millions of them over the coming years.

But the bulbs contain small amounts of mercury, a neurotoxin, and the companies and federal government haven’t come up with effective ways to get Americans to recycle them.

I think infant bottle nipples should be made of CFLs! Only then, after the brains of your children have been destroyed, can you come for my traditional standard lightbulbs!

Prior coverage in this blog of the motherfuckers trying to make me blind, drowsy, and to wish for death:
Thank God! I Am Saved From The Lighting Nazis!!
Your Final Warning: Don’t. You. Fucking. Dare!
Don’t You Bastards DARE To Even TRY This Here!

Thank God! I Am Saved From The Lighting Nazis!!

Eat this, you motherfuckers!

CFL light bulbs save electricity, but they also contain toxic mercury ‚ and Metro makes them a hassle to recycle

The drive to save energy in the wake of last year’s electricity price hike has created a ticking environmental time bomb – one that could send mercury to the region’s landfills and water supply.

Compact fluorescent light bulbs – the energy-efficient lights promoted by PGE as a way of fighting the power crunch – contain mercury, a poison that can devastate any environment where it accumulates. And while the bulbs can be recycled, there’s a serious hitch: Metro currently doesn’t offer curbside pick-up for the bulbs. That means people who aren’t willing to drive them to a recycling facility – and people who haven’t been warned about the bulbs – may end up putting them out with the trash.

–linkswipe via reddit

Prior coverage in this blog of the motherfuckers trying to make me blind, drowsy, and to wish for death:
Your Final Warning: Don’t. You. Fucking. Dare!
Don’t You Bastards DARE To Even TRY This Here!

Your Final Warning: Don’t. You. Fucking. Dare!

Europe to unplug from common light bulbs
In warming stand, bulb makers agree to eliminate least efficient lighting

They estimated that if all inefficient traditional incandescent bulbs sold in Europe were to be replaced with more efficient bulbs — such as compact fluorescent lamps or CFLs — the continent would need 27 fewer power plants.

And:

last month, Australia’s government announced plans to ban incandescent bulbs within three years, while a California and New Jersey lawmakers introduced bills seeking to do the same in those states. Last year, Wal-Mart Stores Inc., the world’s largest retailer, began actively promoting the bulbs.

You wanna see me go all Robert DeNiro Taxi Driver on your ass? Just try to take away my standard light bulbs, goddammit!

It will be War!

Prior coverage in this blog of the motherfuckers trying to make me blind, drowsy, and to wish for death:
Don’t You Bastards DARE To Even TRY This Here!

Firefox: Slower Is Better

Ah, that’s better.

I undid the Firefox mods and although it’s now noticeably slower, I’m not having problems with entering WordPress posts now.

Prior coverage in this blog of my eejitcy (on this particular subject, that is):
Mike Cane Is A Fucking Eejit!!!
Argh. WordPress Is Screwing With My Head!!!
Another Day Of WordPress Craziness
WordPress: The Horror!
Reference: Improving Firefox
WordPress Is Being Weird Today (although this was posted before the Firefox mod post, I actually did the mods earlier…)