Hi! My Name Is Jeff Zucker. And I Think You’re Stupid.

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Hai! I B Doin The Chuck On Ur Ass Soon! LOL!!

NBC to Offer Downloads of Its Shows

NBC makes many of its popular shows available online in streaming media, which means that fans can watch episodes on their computers. Under the new NBC service, called NBC Direct, consumers will be able to download, for no fee, NBC programs like “Heroes,” “The Office” and “The Tonight Show With Jay Leno” on the night that they are broadcast and keep them for seven days. They would also be able to subscribe to shows, guaranteeing delivery each week.

But the files, which would be downloaded overnight to home computers, would contain commercials that viewers would not be able to skip through. And the file would not be transferable to a disk or to another computer.

The files would degrade after the seven-day period and be unwatchable. “Kind of like ‘Mission: Impossible,’ only I don’t think there would be any explosion and smoke,” Mr. Gaspin said.

Emphasis added by me. Original stupidity by the The Suits.

Fake Fake Steve Jobs gets it in one:

Roll out all the different systems that don’t work together. Bring on all the different kinds of software, none of which will work as well as iTunes. Bring on a zillion different user interfaces, a zillion accounts you need to set up, a zillion new usernames and passwords and a list of which services can work on which devices in which format. Right.

Yeah. I just lovvvved downloading that piece of shit Amazon Unbox software to watch Journeyman.

Previously in this blog:
NBC: Settle With Apple
A Third Post-iTunes Fable For NBC: Steve Jobs Is Journeyman
A Second Post-iTunes Fable For NBC: You Got Chucked!
A Post-iTunes Fable For NBC
I Wish I Thought Of That!
By The Book: Jeff Zucker Vs. Steve Jobs
Jeff Zucker: Like Dubya, Only Worse
Newsflash! Jeff Zucker Buys Condo From Dick Morris!
Jeff Zucker: He Don’t Do Emo
Jff Zukr: Ur No Gneeiz No
Quote Of The Day: Jobs Rulz, Gates Luz
A Post-iTunes Fable For NBC
Should Apple Turn iTunes Into A Platform?

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